Jesus is not dead… he is the owner of Studio 54.
What a novel concept the man who can turn water into wine. Turned an empty room into heaven on earth. See the interviews with the people who lived the experience.

“Yea, I remember Jesus he and the apostles were the biggest partiers around.
That water to wine thing was the gimmick. He got all the babes. Roman orgies were nothing when Jesus came around. “ Mary Magdelain

“Jesus… Jesus… Jesus! Enough already with this fucking… Jesus. His gimmick put me out of business.” Lucifer